Sermon on Luke 10:38-42
Pastor Jennifer Garcia
Where do you see yourself in this story?
Do you see yourself in Martha?
1. Tired
2. Stressed out
3. Frustrated that no one’s helping her—not even her own sister who “should” be helping her
Do you see yourself in Mary?
1. Passionate
2. Fascinated by someone or something when she really “should” be doing something else
Do you see yourself in Jesus?
1. Stuck in the middle of two other people’s disagreement
2. Asked to pick a side in a “no-win” situation
Perhaps you’ve been like all three characters at different points.
I love how messy and human this story is. Sometimes people use this story to draw conclusions about learning and contemplating being more important than service. Sometimes people even pit Mary and Martha against each other, villainizing the actions of one or the other.
But all I see are three people acting in very human ways.
· Martha, stressed out and testy,
· Mary, focused and oblivious at the same time,
· Jesus, caught in the middle of an argument he had nothing to do with.
Martha’s doing what’s expected of her. She’s showing hospitality to her guests. She’s doing what she’s supposed to do.
And the expectations of that are becoming too much. She’s stressed out, overworked, and overwhelmed.
So, she does something that I’m sure none of us have ever done when we’re stressed out, overworked, and overwhelmed: she lashes out.
Martha could have calmly pulled her sister aside and asked for her help (which is reasonable to expect—Mary would be expected to help in making the guests feel at home).
But, Martha’s frustration gets the better of her, and she goes to Jesus, instead of Mary, with her complaints.
I wonder if Mary felt embarrassed, being called out like that. After all, it’s true that she “should” have been helping Martha. Hospitality is important, and she was neglecting her guests. I wonder if she was angry at Martha for literally and metaphorically “telling the teacher” on her.
And Jesus is caught in the middle of this understandable dispute. Should one do what one “should” or learn when the opportunity arises?
Jesus invites Martha to join in the learning.
Jesus isn’t saying that hospitality is bad or that Martha is doing the wrong thing.
But he invites her into something better.
He invites her to step away from her distractions, worries, and society’s expectations and become a disciple.
Sometimes even good things get in the way.
Martha’s efforts were good—she was doing what she “should” and being responsible and caring. But it kept her from entering into a deeper relationship with Jesus.
So, Jesus allows her to set down her “shoulds” and spend some time with him.
How often do we let our “shoulds” get in the way of relationships?
The first time I hosted a meeting for my women’s group from church, my “shoulds” took over.
I was in my early twenties and determined to prove myself.
I was going to throw the best wine and cheese party they had ever seen.
I found an article about how to throw a wine and cheese party, and I followed everything to the letter. I bought an embarrassingly large amount of food. There was enough food to feed a high school football team. I bought cheese knives I didn’t need and spent way too long making little name cards for all the cheeses. I spent a ridiculous amount of time obsessing over every detail. I threw my budget out the window and exhausted myself in my efforts to create perfection. And when the meeting actually happened, I didn’t even have that good of a time.
I was doing all of this out of insecurity, not hospitality. I wanted to impress people, get validation, and be the perfect host to hide my vulnerabilities, not so that my guests would feel at home and loved. I was making it about me instead of about them. I was letting the “shoulds” in my head overwhelm the intentions of my heart to give a gift to my guests.
What would it have looked like if I had set down my “shoulds” and been myself?
1. There might have been moments of connection that I wouldn’t have missed out on because I was so worried about how I was perceived.
2. My guests might have felt more at home with honest conversation.
3. We would have had a chance to take our armor off and be real with each other.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with offering hospitality to guests—it’s an important value throughout the Bible, especially when the guests are people marginalized by society.
We read a beautiful story from Genesis today about hospitality. Three divine guests visit Abraham and Sarah, who rush around (not unlike Martha) getting a meal together. Then, the guests announce that Sarah will have a child—a longed-for and unlikelypromise. This story is held up as an exemplar of biblical hospitality, and Martha is often regarded with a sadly shaking head. It’s not hospitality that’s the problem.
Instead of offering hospitality like Abraham and Sarah did, I, and perhaps Martha, was putting my expectations and society’s expectations over the actual needs and desires of my guests. We both missed out on connecting with our guests in a genuine way, because we were bustling about trying to get through all our “shoulds.”
What if we allow ourselves to be messy and human? What blessing might we get in return?
What would it look like for each of us to give up just one “should” today for the chance to deepen our relationships with God and one another?
It might raise some eyebrows.
There is resistance when people go against society’s expectations.
But on the other hand, at what cost are we armoring up, keeping ourselves busy with “good” things we “should” be doing, and refusing to be vulnerable and authentic with the people around us?
Be brave.
Set down just one “should” today. See what happens.
Let yourself learn from those around you and let them see the real you.
That gift won’t be taken away from you.